finding it hard to keep my head above the water (L/C mention )

[marie Ethan's mum]

My kids are my world but  when ethan died it was like someone blow up the whole of america or something ,

how do you live in a world without such a major part..........

Many people have said to me since Ethan's death ...well at least he's not in pain anymore ,you don't want to see your child in pain but I do every day

I watch my Living children in pain everyday missing their brother ,how do you make kids understand why he had to die when you don't undrstand it yourself..

My son went and bought a Man u shirt today with his own birthday money and when I asked what name he wanted on the back  (meaning rooney or ronaldo etc) he said mummy I want Ethan's name ..It was so lovely and I'm so proud of my son at nine to want to remember this baby brother  he hardly knew but It still felt like I'd be hit by a truck again ..

Meghan has started crying at night again for ethan , what do I say who do I stop her pain ... I've heard her crying some nights and not gone in to check on her so I don't have to see her tears for him and try to hide mine, how terrible is that ,

madison talks about him all the time which is so lovely but also hurts when she does as she says all the time when Ethan comes back mummy ...

Erin doesn't talk yet but I dread the day she may ask me who is that other baby in the photos mummy .... Does she remember him , does she know


meg got upset when a friend said Ethan was her brother , stupidly  I asked why are you upset meg , she said no mummy he IS my brother , but he's in heaven

not coping today sorry just needed to write this done


I miss you so much cheeky monkey

[CharlotteJayandLiam]

I'm so sorry, it must be so hard seeing your children in pain, like that. Do you think counselling would work for the older one's, or even somewhere they can talk openly about him for an hour a week or something, just so they can relive his memories? Sorry, once again. xx

[***clairelouise-finlays mummy ***]

  thinking of you babe 

[marie Ethan's mum]

school offers counselling but there is a wait ,

 but the vicar who baptised my children including  ethan and  then did his funeral , has spoken to them a few times but think I may have to ask Her to speak with them some more...she visits them at school as well as at home so hopefully it will help in time ,

[mel - jakesangelmummy]

 

Marie, Although it's lovely that your children remember ethan, Im sure it breaks your heart to see them hurting.

I really do hope that things get easier for them in time but I know they will never forget their special little brother

Take care

 

[Olliemam+1]

Marie

God bless you, it must be so so hard, like you say it is lovely that your children remember theri brother, but on the other hand it must break your heart all over again everytime that your precious Ethan is mentioned.  I wish I could take your pain away, I really do.

Sending you  , I wishI could say more, but I am sorry I really do not know what else to say.

Sending you all my love


Dawn xxxxx.