am I being over sensitive

[marie Ethan's mum]

 I'm not sure if it's because I've been having a tough time lately but I have found myself getting really annoyed with pregnant friends always talking about the size of their bumps ,and then everyone of them at the minute making comments like

    ''I hope it isn't twins''
     ''I pray it isn't twins ''

and this is my favourite that a so called friend  said  last night actually

    '' I'd kill myself if the scan showed I was having twins ''

I think I am being over sensitive  , and I know the comments weren't  about me or my situation  or my twins  but I just wished  people wouldn't  make these sort of comments  even if they are meant as light hearted.

these comments to me are just as hurtful as the dead baby jokes...  so it is practically hurtful when angel mums have actually made these sorts of comments   

some people would give anything to have their twin or twins back

[marie Ethan's mum]

sorry I must correct not'' everyone''  of my pregnant friends but several of my pregnant friends

I apologise , it's  not everyone just a few

[mum2evan+dyfan]

no i don't think you're being over sensitive.  i just think that being mum to angels we are more sensitive to things that most people don't give a second thought to.
i know pregnant people annoy me when they moan about how big their bump is, how swollen their ankles are etc - do they not know how lucky they are to be that pregnant?  i suppose no they don't know how lucky they are they just take it for granted.
i have noticed though since the boys died noone has said to me "kids who'd have them?".  i guess thats a bit close to the mark.

Kathxxx

[marie Ethan's mum]

I feel really bad for making this post but it's been ripping me apart inside lately ,

[mel - jakesangelmummy]

 

Dont feel bad for posting. Its what we are here for and I can completly understand why these sort of comments upset you. I know you would give anything to have both of your twins at home with you causing mischief 


 

[marie Ethan's mum]

people always smile and say  ''you've got your hands full'' when they look at my gang and i always smile back but inside my heart says

''not full enough''

[kimbobt84-BensMummy]

marie i think kath was right when she said mums to angels are not over sensitive, just more sensitive after loss. Most people don't realise the blessing of children, especially twins. I wish for people not to find out its twins, i can't have them, why should anyone else. Selfish, but true, to protect my feelings. I dread hearing 'i'm huge, could it be twins' x

[Olliemam+1]

Marie

I don't think that you are being over sensitive, it is only natural if you have suffered the worst thing in the world, lossing you child or children you never know what comments will hurt you.  Sending you loads and loads of  .

Take care

Dawn xxxxx. 

[Bretts mummy Emma]

Marie you are not being over sensitive babes after losing a baby at any stage be it a twin or both twin or just a single child any comment that we 'may' have been guilty of saying ourselves in the past we take to heart. I used to say things like 'kids who'd have them?' quite a bit before having Brett yet everytime I hear someone say it now I cringe and it hurts cos I would do anything to have Brett back. If losing Brett has taught me one thing it's that you change your way of thinking after losing a baby. If Brett were still here and I had never heard of any of you or OFB I would prob be one of those mother's saying 'kids who'd have them?'  a lot of it is ignorance or naivity rather than them being malicious

[***clairelouise-finlays mummy ***]

  no babe you are not being insensative xx hugz

[GillyF]

Marie,

You're not being overly sensitive, those women were extraordinarily thoughtless. The last comment made to you was breathtakingly tactless, and what it shows is that these people are totally self-centred. It's far too much trouble to them to stop and think of you and your loss before they say something twin-related. It's not hard to show some sensitivity, but sadly it's so old fashioned these days to think of the effects of what you do and say on others.

Still, even by the me-me-me standards of today those comments are shocking and I'm so sorry you had to suffer them.

Best wishes
Gilly

[marie Ethan's mum]

thanks girls , I got may own back today , when someone said thank god is wasn't twins to me regarding their recent scan last week ,

I just said it's ok I knew it wouldn't be twins cos you wouldn't be able to cope with twins , this person looked gutted , I then said oh sorry did I hurt your feelingss then sorry , but maybe you know how I felt last week with you asking me to pray and cross fingers for you that it aint twins,   

I save my finger crossing and prays for the people who really deserve them the people who are desperate for any precious life ....

and  suprise suprise  I got deleted , whoops   

[***clairelouise-finlays mummy ***]

  well done babe  .. that told them x

[kimbobt84-BensMummy]

go marie...go marie...go marie x

[marie~elises mummy]